So you want to waste gas like a moron? OK, well here is my 7 step guide on how to become the ultimate moron:
1- Don,t Use Your Legs: Never use public transportation, bikes or walk no matter the distance, that’s for hippies.
2- Don’t Drive Like your Grandmother: Drive always Over 65 MPH in highway, this give you as much as 21% wastes compared to drive below 55 MPH.
3- Avoid Car Maintenance: Like keeping your engine tuned, Change oil, keep tires inflated properly and replace air filters. Car Maintenance is a waste of your precious recreation time. Let’s go watch the football game! Yeaahhh!
4- Don’t Turn Off Your Car: A car with the engine running gets zero miles per gallon when it’s not moving, So idling is a great way to waste fuel. Now you Know, when you are waiting for somebody don,t turn off your car. Also don’t forget to give the proper warm up to your car before start running, 15 minutes is Ok.
5-Use the Jack Rabbit and quik stop driving style: it’s FUN, and waste a lot.
6- Put More Junk into your car: Hey, its a waste of space if you don’t use it, those SUV’s are big for a reason put some stuff in there. For every extra 250 pound you put in your car, one extra gallon will be wasted per mile. Also remember to put some junk in the roof to increment the wind drag!
7- Invest in a Hummer: But Drive it With a combination of all the above tips and you will get a superb 6 miles per gallon.
Congratulations, you are now officially Wasting Gas Like a Moron.
I found your site on technorati and read a few of your other posts. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed to my Google News Reader. Looking forward to reading more from you down the road!
Ivan,
Glad your saving $100+ per month on fuel – some of my mining equipment burns more fuel than that in an hour. Also, keep conserving gas, as my Lamborghini only gets about 5-6 MPG and I really need the fuel that you and your buddies are saving – Thanks!!